First Spinal Stem Cell Transplant Completed

For your amusement, I thought I would do a little interview with myself about the procedure:

How did the procedure go?

Everything went smoothly for the most part. I had an IV placed in my right arm a few hours before the procedure. As usual, the nurses had some difficulty finding a suitable vein to use. It was like they were trying to do an IV on a corpse.

Are you afraid of needles?

That’s not really relevant to this discussion, can we move on?

Okay, where was the procedure done?

The procedure was done on the ninth floor. Our ward is on the eighth floor so I was transported via the hospital bed to a room upstairs. My wife was not allowed to film the procedure because they are very strict about keeping the room sterilized.

Were you awake during the procedure?

I was semi-conscious. I was aware of being in a sleep state but I couldn’t feel the needle that was inserted. The whole procedure took about 30 minutes.

What did the doctors do?

Actually it was only one doctor and two other nurses assisting. I had to lie on my side while he inserted the needle into my lower back (lumbar area). I was then placed flat on my back and transported to my room.

That was it? Wow, must have been a piece of cake?

I wish. Once back in my room I had to lie flat for a period of six hours without a pillow and not being able move my body or head. The thought is that the stem cells needed to be able to freely transport throughout the spinal cord from the head region to the rest of the body.

What’s so hard about lying down for six hours?

Aww…you forget my friend; I was unable to use the bathroom at all for that time period. Also remember that I am on an active IV during that whole time which fills up your bladder. It was a lot more challenging than meets the eye.

Hey, isn’t one of your favorite shows the Shield playing tonight in the U.S.? Too bad you weren’t able to watch it while you were waiting. I heard it is supposed to be a good episode.

Thanks for your compassion. Am I really that insensitive?

Hey, you are the one who asked me to do this interview. Don’t get an attitude with me! Next time do it yourself!

I am doing it myself. Can we just move on?

When did your six hours end?

Around 9 PM. I got up, used the bathroom, and had something to eat.

Are looking forward to the other four spinal stem cell treatments you have coming up?

What do you think? Are you looking forward to paying taxes?